Bottle of Patience with the side of optimism.
I found another medium to help alleviate work related stress and anxiety. I found myself drawing while I was on a call today at work. Didn’t really thought that I could draw until i just started doodling and this is what I came up with. I think that is just apt that I name this bottle patience because this is something that cannot be bought. It is something that you are blessed with, and maybe if all mankind has the right amount of patience then the world would probably be less chaotic. I am still the optimist.
I work in a call center and a lot of people think that sitting down on your rump all day is easy work and there’s no reason why I should be stressing about it. I go through the wringer everyday just to make sure that I please that person on the other end of my phone line while at the same time making sure I hit my goal metrics by executing different mandated bullet points in the process. It is all about balancing the numbers they say, do not overthink it they say…. It is the nature of the beast unfortunately, it is about either you sink or swim. I intend to swim as far as my will and patience is able to take me
I have been trying to find ways to ease my stress level for quite some time now because of work. The last straw was when I found myself standing fifty feet away from the door of my job, I felt like Aladdin all of a sudden. You know that scene where he is about to go in the cave of wonders…. I knew then that I needed to see a doctor, which I did and she gave me my happy pills and it helped “taking off the edge a bit” as how she puts it. It is funny (it is actually not..) how that probably half of the people in my team including myself are on happy pills. In an effort to find ways to De-stress, I started seeing them doing adult coloring books at their desks.
That night I did went to Barnes and Nobles to pick up adult coloring books and gel pens from the craft store. I somehow found it to be rewarding in some ways but then again I don’t know if it stresses me up more because I cant decide on what color to use next (facepalm).
It is strange on how your internal organs dictate what you should be doing in the most inopportune moment. The occasional need to get up and tinkle in the middle of a calm and awesome dream of you umm… tinkling. This morning I was woken up by a loud growl that im sure everybody is very familiar of. That unexplained feeling that consumes you from the inside out. Yes folks, my unforgiving stomach is growling loud enough for me to hear it physically. As much as I was still enjoying my slumber I had to get up and answer the call of need. The need to devour morning offerings of carbs and protein and of course not to forget caffeine. I remembered watching one of those food channels the other night, the show where this guy traveled in exotic places and feature what to eat in them places. Needless to say, I braved the fall air with my bed hair and the clothes I quickly threw on and went to my favorite breakfast place.
Whats on the menu? Fluffy golden biscuits smothered with good old southern gravy, just thinking about it makes my mouth water. To be honest I was reluctant on ordering it because the first and last time I had it didn’t sit well in my stomach. I had it at a county fair in North Carolina and its one of those places that had been there for years so I know its just me. I am glad that I took a chance this time because it satisfied the craving and the taste was far from what I remembered. The sight of biscuits swimming in a sea of sausage gravy is nothing compared to when you scoop it with a fork and and try as best as you can to down it without gravy dripping on your shirt. My face was like of Andrew Zimmerns when he finally tastes that delicacy of pig brains or sea urchin or of whatever he is being offered by whoever is hosting the feast. Well I know there’s no comparison between “biscuits and sausage gravy” and “pigbrains” or “sea urchin” but you know the gist.Other than the usual bacon eggs and hash browns with a side of buttermilk pancakes is our favorite nutella crepe. Not only that this gives my sweet tooth the satisfaction of just having it but the fresh berries are always on point. Its a good way to seal the deal of any meal. My apologies for sounding so cheesy but im giving myself a pat on the back for coming up with that one on the fly.
I have never felt so excited about my weekends and how I was going to spend it. I have just done a 7 day stretch at work and it kind of reminded me why I have avoided shift swaps, heck I dont even swap shifts with myself. I swapped schedules with one of the guys I went to training with, only because he is a nice dude and he said that he is celebrating his anniversary with his wife. I am not complaining and I was happy to do it but that would be the first and last time im going to do it. I remember reading that taking days off or going on vacation prolongs your life because it reduces stressors that can contribute to coronary heart disease. It’s kind of doing a reboot on your whole body including your mind. Nearing the end of that long stretch was that feeling reminiscent of when I had to write a 14 page essay paper for my greek mythology class. It took me three days sitting in front of my computer trying to squeeze out material out of whatever my lazy bum can come up with when I did research about my topic. And also I have never experienced school detention but in my mind I was thinking that this is probably how it felt like. I was happy that I did it because I know I have made somebody happy but at the same token the next time somebody asks, I dont think I’m going to have an issue saying no.
Hello?!?! Is this thing on? *tap**tap*. It had been a while since I wrote on this medium because although that my head are filled with things that would be worth writing, there are a lot of things that would restrain me from doing so, like work…work… work…(im starting to hear Rihanna in my head) and sleep.
Other than time constraints, a big factor of me not being able to write is that I would always fight with myself when I do. Shakespeare did say “To thine own self be true” and this had been always a struggle. This subject came up when a friend and I was discussing about what would be the hardest thing to do when you’re writing, the answer was to stop censoring yourself. I have to admit that she is absolutely correct. Even though I know that I am writing for my own sanity, my subconscious always dictates that I have to be PC and follow some sort of etiquette just in case somebody else other than me reads what i wrote. It didn’t really matter if I was utilizing the blog or the good ole pencil and paper, it always comes back to that same struggle with myself of not being true to thine self.
Another factor would be me just being lazy about it and just let my thoughts wander off until the idea gets lost and fall into the crevices of my brain. That is probably why I resorted to photography because it is the same as writing but only with pictures. I know that this blog is a work in progress. As you can see there are gaps (big ones) in between each entry, but hopefully I would be able to fill it with things that would make sense to me more than to you. If that would to happen, then I know that I have achieved my goal of getting past the struggle.